Not long from now I will be embarking on the momentous journey that is homeschooling. This certainly wasn't always the plan.
Ever since my first son was born, I have been waiting for the day I could pack his little book bag, pat him on his little head, and then tell him not to come home until 3pm and lock the door behind him. Then I would do all of the things I had been putting off because of the kid. Getting a personal trainer, doing more charity work, make dinner. And I certainly wouldn't be missing any more Judge Judy.
He managed to make it through his toddler years without becoming a sociopath even though we decided against preschool. We thought cheap bottles of wine and a Netflix subscription were a better way to get a break from being parents. (Be honest, isn't that all preschool is anyway?)
In the past year he has learned all of his letter sounds and can read simple things. He can add and subtract in his head. We try to engage him in lots of philosophical discussions such as, "How the boy in the wheelchair is just like you," and, "Why we don't pee in the garage."
Our school district is mediocre. And since I am going to be home all day anyway, we decided it was in his best interest to start with homeschooling. Maybe forever, maybe until I'm sure he won't know what Oxycontin is before he turns 10.
What amazes me is this. Whenever I inform other parents of my decision (mostly other moms) you would think I just told them that in lieu of school, we are going to lock my son in a lead box and read him text books through a speaking tube for the next 13 years.
The first thing they say is something to the affect of "I just wouldn't have the patience." I get that. It is going to be a time consuming and daunting task. Especially at first. Considering my kids will be 5, 3, and 1, you might think I'm insane. I know that at first it will be like trying to teach the oldest monkey to use simple tools, while the younger monkeys run around and throw poop at you. But eventually we will find a system (and a more expensive wine) that works.
The next thing the other moms mention is the "socialization". A few things things always pop into my head.
1) Where exactly do you think we will be having school? In a fall out shelter? No. We will be in the same places we go now. Our home, the library, the park. And considering he never shuts the hell up and that he just asked your daughter if she thought he looked "
debonair", I'd say we are doing pretty well on the socialization.
2) What is so amazing about the socialization at a regular school? I even went to a private school and by the third grade, I knew what a blow job was. I also had added the "S" word to my vocabulary by the time I left elementary school. (Don't tell my mom). Spending 90% of your time with kids your own age isn't exactly a prime social experience.
3) Everyone is always talking about the environment in schools. The bullying, the superficial attitude, good kids being ignored because the bad kids take up too much time. And....
4)People are always saying parents no longer play a big enough roll in their children's lives. You always hear about not having enough "family time" and how this is detrimental to a child. Home schooling is a great solution to both of these problems. How many people do you hear about being bullied in home school, or in home school programs? How many home school teen pregnancies do you hear about? So few, actually, that I couldn't find any stats about it.
And last but not least, I think there is no denying the educational value of home schooling.
Here is a link to the findings of a study done comparing home schoolers and traditional students. Basically, no matter your income or education level, if you home school your kid he/she will be in the 80th percentile and above. Percentile of what I'm not sure. But hopefully it's not teen pregnancy.
So next time someone tells you they are home educating their kids, tell them how great it is instead of how crazy. Because although I may actually be insane, the choice to home school is probably the most logical thing I've done in a long time.
